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My Story
is a real health issue that I have had in May, 10th of 2017. On this day I feeled not so well during I stand up in the morning. I went to the toilette and then in a session I lost a lot of blood. That was not my day and I felt very uncomfortable. I go back to my bed and have a break but then I think I should call the ambulance. So I do I call the ambulance and they come late and bring me to the KFJ Hospital. After a while I feel better and I'm asking what they want do here in the hospital to help me in my situation. They said I stay here for a short time and I think this is OK for me. But then it comes worst then I ever thought, I fall in unconscious and the doctor ordert in a fast reaction to make a surgery inside my abdominal.
The found out that my pancreas is necrotic and died inside my body. During this emergency suregery they found out that the necrotic pancreas is digeseted itself and the other organs and the intestinal. The enzym disbands all around them - "it must be that we must cut of the head of the pancreas and make a reinsertion hole inside the intestinal.

They bring me to a deep sleep comma for the reason that my survive chances are better. Now I'm in deep sleep comma for the next 61 days after they wake me up. Every 2nd or 3rd day they make a surgery where they pump up the enzym and all this blood mucous that is inside my abdominal.

The live machines are support my small live during this time in the intensive care station. This machines are working 24/7 from ghost hand and where refilled from the nurses they have had a watch all the time on my near death body. After this 61 days of the deep sleep comma they bring me into a other room for a new episode of the rest of my live.

Room 317 was my new home where I wake up and there was on my right side from the bed a person that I see in my live before but I can't remember her name. (She was my wife and I vergot her name). I can't remember her and all what was before in my live. During my first night in room 317 I've a chills and can remember nothing where I come from and what I'm doing here. I also vergot that I've a child with my wife and that we have in sum 3 childrens from her first man and so on. I want to remember back in the days of my live but this was impossible.

My information inside my brain are death and I can't my mind till today. I lost all my information from near 2007 till 2017 in this time all memorys are gone. All holidays, all discusions, all the good things are away from me and my family. After one year of living with a stranger person that talk to me, she is my wife I leave her and live till today allown. I can't remember her again due all this medical issues what I have had and till today my depression are not gone. I'm very depressive. In room 317 I stay till 128 days of my visit and the make every 2 days or 3 days a surgery to clean up all organs inside my body. The professor of the hospital is coming in the first day and told me that I've only a little survive chance from only 5%.

I'm happy to hear this and why you don't let me die? We must make you survive inside my hospital he said. Three times I think that I give up and would never more live. With this hole in my abdominal and this hurt inside my precarius body. Then a other issue began to make my live impossible. My intestinal run from one night on in the wrong direction all I've inside my intestinal are come back to my stomach. I vomit all the shit inside me out over my mouth! All the specialist doctors are stand around me and have no idea where this comes from?
They start to give me a lot of infusions and syntetic heroin to stand my hurt. Every day and night they have a watch on my body and give me injections from morning till the night - I can't remeber how often they give me a injection. At the next days I feel better and I overwound this horror nightmare. My skin is very white like a white wall I'm bloodless and week. My energy is out and I think I give up but then a phase of nightmares are start and this was the heroin what they given me. My nightmare that I've during this time was uninterrupted and still the film in my brain come from this drugs again and again near endless. I remember they said something like Acpi3 or hutch and so on. I was permanent full of this drugs and a shiny light was around me and someone went up and down and talking incomprehensible words. This nightmare never end during this phase in the hospital.

Now my problem with the brain was perfect I can remember not what I'm doing before this nightmare. I can't remember my job and not that what I'm doing in my profession - all fade away. I'm fade away in my mind and can't remember anything. A daily nightmare is following me in my brain every day and every night during my sleep. I would like to do a small math example to calculate what I must pay for my flat and for the electricity but I can't do the simple math. I'm appalled to that situation that I can't do anything anymore. I'm asking for my mobile phone but noone will have it and I can't remember to whom I gave it.

After a while my mobil was found from the hospital personal. I begin to order a brand new laptop and this was send to my wife and she bring me that laptop then into the hospital. All 3 days they bring me to a new sugery for cleaning up my inside abdominal around my rest of the pancreas. A necrotic pangreas is not so that what you need it is more the end of your live! If you loose your pangreas you are weak and floppy (liveless). I must learn the mathematic in tis days during I've be inside the hospital. Then they bring me back to the earth from this drug station they given me pills for the deprivation. After a while a man stand inside my room and asking me about my name, date of birth and so on. This man was from the court and he asking me things about my live to recognize that I'm normal inside my brain and he will give me my rights back. If you're come to a intensive care and have no more chance to survive the court will incapacitate you. So you don't have the right to sign anymore. After a possible comeback they make all this rights back for your normal live and this is now. But with my profession I'm duing not so good - he will understand all this in my case and give me back my citizen right. I get my Laptop and now I ordert first a Casio LCD wrist watch direct into the hospital - this model I would like to have during the 80s. I can remember all the things from the 80s but nothing from the near past ago 10 years are all gone. Till today I can't remember my children they are growing up at our house and no holiday where I've been with my family. Well I leve my wive because she was a foriner for me and the children don't have any contact yes today I'm allown. In 2018 near a year after my hospitalisations end I start to build a motorized antenna and make a plan for doing this idea to a CAD program. But there was a start problem I can't use a CAD program that I use for cuting out the items (parts) with a CNC-laser. So it come to this Idea and I need very long time to make this happend. Today I can concentrate sometimes only one hour and sometimes two hours but then my power is gone. After 4.5 years a light is on the horizon and after the last surgerys Nr.42 & 43 I get a closed abdominal. Now after 5 years I can live a life with all the complications that a died necrotic pancreas bring.